Tuesday, December 25, 2007




Christmas Carols for the "Disturbed"
1. Schizophrenia - "Do you hear what I hear?"

2. Multiple Personality Disorder - "We Three Kings Disoriented"

3. Dementia - "I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas"

4. Narcissistic - "Hark the Hearald Angels Sing About Me"

5. Manic - "Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets"

6. Paranoid - "Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me"

7. Borderline Personality Disorder - "Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire"

8. Personality Disorder - "You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why"

9. Attention Deficit Dsorder - " Silent Night, Holy ooooh look at the froggy; can I have a chocolate; why is France so far away?

10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - "Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells...



Sunday, November 18, 2007

Trans Siberian Orchestra...

OK...There was this guy on Craigslist yesterday giving a ticket to TSO away for the concert last night. He said he wasn't looking for a date, but proceeded to explain that he was a "DWM, 43 and down to earth." So I don't know if a date was what he had in mind or what, but I was more interested in finding out what "TSO" was. Well...as mentioned in the title it is the "Trans Siberian Orchestra"...have you ever heard of them? I am sure you have...somehow I can be oblivious to some things... They are like this heavy metal orchestra rock band...and I think they are soooo cool. And wish with all my heart I had purchased tickets last night for me and the kids to see them...at $75 a pop for nose bleed seats mind you. Anyway...the kids and I have been listening to them this morning and having a great time. We are preparing our Thanksgiving Day feast today...(the kids are with their Dad for the actual Thanksgiving this year). So it is making us feel excited for the holidays. I have a couple for you to look at...we especially like this one and were singing it together...we're almost as good....

Christmas Canon

And this guy did quite a wonderful light show with the Wizards in Winter

Now tell me that they are not cool. I have instantly purchased 3 CDs on Ebay...I can hardly wait to get them. Oops, I am typing to the music...better go.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007


Sarah, my wonderful daughter just turned 12. She is in the 6th grade, and (ugh!) this is the age in which some girls begin to show their true...nasty...colors. Whether it is getting upset because one girl played with someone else today, or the sulking and and game playing and saying things like "I'll forgive you, when you figure out why I am mad and apologize" (Yes, Sarah actually had a friend say that yesterday.) Do you remember Adolescence? I don't know about the rest of you, but I remember it vividly...as a horror movie. I hated my early teen years. I guess the good thing is I can coach her on how to handle it better than I did. What I really love is Sarah trusts me and actually listens and takes my advice. I hope that continues for many years to come. If I could only do those years over...ACKKKK! What am I saying...?

Anyway...that isn't exactly why I am writing today. As I had a long conversation yesterday about how awful girls can be and how Sarah can avoid the pitfalls of it all...from avoiding gossip... understanding that if one friend is talking bad about their other friend to Sarah, she probably talks badly about Sarah to the other friends, and if one girl is nicer, smarter than the other girls, they will likely not like her because she is nicer and smarter...Go figure...And how to be nice and friendly to all people yet set boundaries and not be a doormat... Ah, so much to tell and so little time.

Well as I was telling her all this stuff, I began to use some of my friends as examples...of how there are some friends who just don't do that. And I realized that I am truly blessed to have, instead of lots and lots of friends, a handful of girlfriends who are truly my friends. Who NEVER make me feel like a doormat, who don't mind if I play with my other friends, who don't play passive/aggressive head games with me, and who don't mind if I AM cuter than them (Inside joke for Paige). But really, some of you read my blog. Some I don't talk to as often as I would like, but I still love because I know you are sincere and good and not like those women I was warned about as a kid growing up. When it comes down to it women can be women's worst enemy with all the competition, gossip, and game playing that goes on. But Women can also be women's best asset when you have girlfriends like I do. So to all my girlfriends...thanks for being the kind of people I could use as an example of true friends to my daughter. Thanks for letting her see what true girlfriends are all about.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

I cleaned my pantry...

One of my favorite things is a clean pantry. It is one of the few areas of my house that when it gets cleaned, it will stay clean for a while...even a month or two. It is also a long process and an area I only get to about once a year...and I cleaned it early last summer. But I began to see little flying creatures and wormy things and knew that something (s) must have been infested and it was getting out of control. So I began. I did in fact find some Jiffy Corn Bread boxes and a bag of rice that became Chicken feed due to infestation. I also froze some boxes that were in question...only because I couldn't open them and look in.. (I hate it when I go to cook some mac 'n cheese and little "things" float to the top) So I figured if they are in there, at least they will be dead and not contributing to the increase of crawly things.

So here's another thing I did that was kind of cool. I took out all the stuff that I didn't want and that we were not going to eat (good stuff...not the bug infested stuff) and offered them on Craigslist. But instead of offering them for free, I decided to see if I could get someone to go to the store and bring me a couple of gallons of milk...not because I couldn't get milk, but because I didn't want to...and this kind of thing amuses me (Hey, I can't drink, Paige and I have given up sugar, and I can't have se...Never mind...Anyway, something has to amuse me.). So, believe it or not I had a gillion responses, and I got 4 gallons of milk brought to me in trade for my food that we were not ever going to eat and a bunch of expired food storage. Now that's cool!...if not a little weird... I think next time I will see if I can get a dozen eggs....

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

WOW! What a trip!!!

So this crazy thing happened last night. What? You ask? I'll tell you.

I am coming down with a cold, so before going to bed last night I took a shot of my favorite alcoholic beverage...NyQuil...so I could rest...and went to bed. Sometime in the middle of some dream in which I am yelling at someone...or something...I don't really remember, I heard this loud screech and a crash. I jumped out of bed, immediately thinking that someone had hit one of my Vanagons...Oh the tragedy that would be. Within seconds I was at my front door opening it to see what had happened. I looked out at my neighborhood...so quiet you could hear a pin drop. All I heard was the sound of a car in the not too far distance driving down the main street nearby and then silence. Nobody else was freaking out wondering what that horrific noise was. Nobody else had bolted to their door, heart racing... In fact, it was apparent I was the only person who had heard a noise...including my kids. Well, feeling really confused...not to mention kind of silly, I sat dumbfounded on my couch and tried to sort out why I jumped out of my bed and ran to the door....I was also waiting for my heart stop racing and was wondering if going back to sleep would be a possibility. Anyway, I did go back to bed...taking note of the time (1:45)...just in case the police would need to know...in the event I actually did bolt out of bed for some reason. I went back to sleep but kept waking up paranoid that perhaps the noise I heard was someone trying to break into my house...and wondering if it was the NyQuil that was making me so paranoid. I imagine for someone who doesn't drink...it wouldn't take much to do funky things to one's head...

Anyway, this morning I couldn't get the experience out of my head...you know like those dreams that when you wake up you are glad they weren't real, but they still feel real all day...you know what I mean? That's how I felt. I told Sarah about the experience and she thought it was weird. Later I told her that I just couldn't tell if it was real or a dream. She asked me how I would ever know. I told her I guess if I drove around the block and saw a wrecked car, I would know it was real.

So on the way to school, Jacob asked me to help him find his cello music. I thought he might have left it in one of my Vanagons...so I went out to look. I got past the back of my Vanagon...and there it was. A totally smashed car. Wow! I didn't have a NyQuil induced hallucination...It was real. I called Sarah over to look and both of us were relieved that I am not crazy...or at least that experience was not evidence of it...

I talked to one of my neighbors about it later and asked if she heard it...NOPE. Nobody in my whole neighborhood heard it...go figure. I finally called the police about it at about 10:00... He was pretty amazed that nobody had called earlier, and that nobody but me had even heard it. I have posted some photos of my view from my front door...and then the car just past the end of my Vanagon. Quite a hit to move it up on the sidewalk and into the brick fence post. I imagine someone else's car isn't looking so good this morning...I bet he/she's not feeling very good either. And while I am sorry for my neighbor...who I don't believe has even seen it yet, I am so relieved it wasn't one of my Vanagons. Whew!

Talk about your trippy Halloween Story!!!! I hope you all have a wonderful time tonight!


Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Works for me....

Paige likes to post "Works for me Wednesday" tips. Well, today I have one of my own. I am so proud of myself that I came up with this one all by myself. I even checked the internet and couldn't find anyone who had discovered this clever little trick....

Well First let me start of by telling you that Saturday was Sarah's 12th birthday. She had her party on Friday. We played the game "Curses"...which was a hilarious hit...thanks Paige... and the kids also carved watermelons...yes watermelons. It was Sarah's Idea...and was also quite a hit. She even entered her carved watermelon in the pumpkin carving contest the next evening and won most original.

Anyway...back to my tip...

Sarah wanted to have a bunch of balloons everywhere for her birthday...she loves balloons. So I bought about 150 balloons and figured I would use my air mattress pump to blow them up. Wrong...not enough pressure...bummer...now what am I going to do. I tried my air compressor...that didn't work either. So I blew one up on my own...OUCH...my ear hurts! OK there was no way I was going to do that 150 times. So I came up with this great idea....here it is...If you soak balloons in very warm water for a while they are waaaay easier to blow up. Did you know that? I blew up 50 balloons in about 10 minutes and it never hurt my ears! So in no time we had a whole bunch of balloons all around the house...we still do. OK...so there's my tip... What do you think about that...?

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Warning....Failure to move head....

....when opening door could be hazardous to your health. I think this warning should be posted on all car doors. I talked to my lawyer about it and asked him if I had a law suit on my hands....after he got through ROTFLHBO....he told me he would check with his associates to see if they would let him take my case. Yes, yesterday when I was out garage sale-ing, I went to get into my van, however I failed to move my head prior to opening the door. The next thing you know...I am holding my bleeding head, saying a few choice words, and thinking "was that really necessary?". Anyway...I had a DR in my ward look at it to see if stitches were needed, but it had already sealed itself closed...so no stitches...but I will have a lovely little scar...that I have happily lived 38 years without. I guess I failed for opening car doors that day...Hopefully, I'll do better...I think I have it down now...Approach Vehicle, Grab Handle, MOVE HEAD, Pull Handle, Open Door, get in, sit down...BE SURE FINGERS ARE CLEAR...just in case, close door. GOT IT!!! It doesn't look so bad when I put make up over it...Thank Heavens!!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

I don't know what posesses me...

The other day I saw this ad on Craigslist from a guy who had found a little 5 day old kitten abandoned in his back yard. He left it there to cry for about 30 minutes and then decided the mom was not coming back so he took it in. He bought the special milk and supplies to feed it. Then, I guess he realized that he had to work the next day, he put an ad on Craigslist to find someone who had nothing better to do than bottle feed a tiny little kitten day and night. Not only bottle feed, but help clean and potty the little thing. Did you know that mommy kitties lick their kittens because they need help going potty? I didn't...so if you take in an orphan kitty you have to use a wash cloth to simulate the mommy kitty licking them. It really is a lot of work! You have to do this every time you feed it... which is about every 2 or 3 hours or so. Also it needs to be kept at 90 degrees....which is not comfortable for most of us...anyway...here's a picture of the sweet little girl...she is only 6 days old...Isn't she sweet?

Sunday, September 30, 2007

Girl's Night Out...

Here's a fun thing to blog about...

I have 2 friends, that I met at a parenting support group about 10 years ago, that I get together with about once a month for dinner and talking. We take turns choosing where we are going to eat so we get to try a great variety of restaurants and kinds of food. Then we sit and talk for hours...usually about 6 or 7...about our kids/grandkids, and life and stuff. I really look forward to it. Well last time we got together, Sannea, one of the friends, indicated that she would like to learn how to make wheat meat. I have made Wheat Meat before so I suggested that this month they come to my house and we make wheat meat for dinner. So that's what we did last night...tacos were on the menu. I wish I had taken pictures...it was fun and in the end, the tacos were pretty good. You really wouldn't know you were not eating ground beef. My friends were impressed. The only problem is it took about 2 hours to make, so while we waited we ate chips and dip, and by the time the tacos were made, we were full. They were good, but would have been much yummier had any of us been hungry. I have left overs today...I wonder if I could get Sarah and Jacob to eat it. Sarah probably...but Jacob...naw! Oh well, it's worth a try.

Other exciting things...Sarah is playing Volleyball and Jacob is playing flag football. Jacob insisted that he didn't want to play numerous times, but I signed him up anyway and made him go. He wasn't happy with me and asked what he will do if there are people he doesn't like. I told him to think of the people he will like. Just as we pulled up the ONE kid (Dallin) that just torments Jacob came to view. My heart sank. As we walked up Dallin made a groaning noise and insisted Jacob would be on the Red Team...Dallin, of course was on the Blue Team. Well I got angry and got in his face and pointed my finger at him and told him "Dallin, I do not suggest you mess with my son!"...In as threatening and scary a voice as I could muster. He looked surprised and I began to walk away. Two steps later I whirled around again, gave him a very serious and threating look and said through gritted teeth, "...And I mean it, don't mess with him!". Then I took two more steps, turned around again, gave him a very threatening look and pointed my finger at him. (Can we say "Mother Bear"?) Then we walked on, fully confident that I had no idea what I would do if he did mess with Jacob, but knowing he knew I was serious about it...what ever it was. I didn't know whether or not Jacob would appreciate his mom protecting him...boys can be funny about that especially if the other boys tease him. He said "Thanks mom."...I love "Thanks mom"...it is simple, but always makes me feel really good...because I have done the right thing in my kid's eyes.

Well, Jacob played his flag football game and I even watched him run a touchdown. He really liked it and was excited to go again 2 days later. Whew...what a relief.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

I have truly found it this time...

I bet your leeetle seessee van can't do dees..........Syncro De Mayo...here we come!!! This is the coolest Vanagon ever! (That I can afford). Introducing the latest...the greatest...my 1987 Volkswagen Vanagon SYNCRO...with full Westfalia Package. (That's all the camping gear). There were only about 1500 of these babies sold in the US...and I have one of them...and a nice one at that. It is a 4-wheel drive with bush guard...for going through the trees on the way to the campgrounds...way out where no body can find us. It has a receiver hitch on front and back...you can see the back one in the picture. I can carry all my stuff without it falling on Sarah and Jacob when I turn. It came with a TV/VCR, microwave, potty and power inverter...as well as a generator.

When I drive down the street people turn their heads...they are sooooo Jealous. Do you know how I know that? Because I used to be jealous when I saw one of these...cause I wanted one. Now I have one and THEY are ALL so jealous. By the way...I stole it and there were about 6 back up people who were very annoyed that I got there first. This guy was one of them....yeah, go get a Jetta...you'll feel better.....NAAAAWT! (It's kind of like radio contest winning...only...first one there wins...better luck next time!)

I had to sell my kids into slavery to pay for this baby...but you know as the song goes...Vanagon Syncros can be together forever....Ahhh! True happiness!

(Kemp thinks I am a member of some secret cult... What do you think?)

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

True Happiness??

I never did properly introduce many of you to my newer Vanagon. You all saw the photos of the really cool one with the murals and the cool head liner... Well that one is long gone and I bought another one last May. These are the pictures of that one. Some of you saw it when I drove it to Utah last month.

I thought I had found the true happiness I had been seeking. But I realize now that it was only a temporary fix. True happiness cannot be found in my 1990 Vanagon Westfalia....no matter how nice...even if it does come equipped with power everything, cruise control...even Air Conditioning isn't enough...nice, but not the source of true happiness. It made me feel happy for a short while...but it isn't true, lasting happiness... You know, when I look back at my blog about the little yellow Vanagon (Affectionately known as Midnight), I thought that was true happiness too. That is not to say that I am not happy...I am. I have just realized that my happiness can't be found in those Vanagons...I can't believe I could be so very, very wrong...

Friday, August 17, 2007

First week of school.

School has begun and the kids have just finished their first week. You know, I am not like those parents who just can't wait for the kids to start school. I mean, who am I going to play with while they are gone? OK, I must admit, having lunch with friends is fun...I love that and have done it twice this week. I also must admit I get a heck of a lot more accomplished when they are gone. But I would rather be playing with them than making money...Isn't there some way I can make money playing with them? That would be nice. Anyway, I think their week went well...

On another note...I have a date tonight. His name is Mike. He and I went out on a blind date almost 2 years ago. We went to one of my favorite Italian restaurants and had a really nice time. When the date was over, I thought...What a nice guy! I hope he asks me out again. Well, he didn't...until 2 weeks ago. Two weeks ago I got a letter from him asking if I remembered him and him explaining about lost phone numbers and busy lives...blah, blah, blah... Anyway, he told me that he did enjoy our date and that he got my address on a drive by...how romantic... Anyway, he asked me out...provided I wasn't currently seeing anyone...and since I am not...we had a date. It was really nice. Good conversation, nice guy. He gave me a hug good bye...WOW...great hugs too!

So tonight Mike (AKA once a year Mike) is making me dinner. Chicken Fettucini Alfredo...he cooks too. And guess what???? HE HAS A STABLE JOB! So with all that going for him...why do I dread the whole thing? I mean...not really, but I just hate starting over. You all know I s*ck at breaking up and I just hate starting a relationship with someone knowing that if and when I need to break up, I won't be able to. Is that dumb or what‽ I've only had 2 dates, think he is nice, HE HAS A JOB and all the other niceties yet I am planning my break up. Is it any wonder I am still single

Mind over matter...we're going to have a great time. I am going to not think about breaking up unless I see good reason to think about it. I don't have to date someone for let's say 4 years before I break up...right? Who knows...maybe by this time next year...I'LL BE MARRIED AND PREGNANT. I wonder if he wants to have more kids...

Wednesday, August 1, 2007


Here's my random thought for the day...or month...however long it takes for me to post again... It may not be important to you...or even interesting, but it is a thought I want to write about, and this is my space to do that.

Have you all read and/or received the home teaching lesson for July? It is by Thomas S. Monson...about hidden wedges. My home teachers gave me the lesson on Sunday and it really made me think. The lesson suggests that hidden wedges are things we have not forgiven which weaken us. It teaches that unless we forgive the wedge will weaken if not destroy. OK...that's simple...Forgive...it is what we have been taught for years...right?

Well, I think it is more than that. We all have wedges and those wedges are what make us who we are. Some have many more wedges than others. What is the sign that we have a wedge? Sensitivity...especially hypersensitivity to ANYTHING is a sign that there is a wedge or many wedges that are affecting our lives. I know that there are some people that I am hypersensitive to...  That is a sign that even though I think I have forgiven their many offenses, there is a wedge (or many wedges) causing the hypersensitivity. Those wedges were planted years ago when someone did something that hurt me and I made a decision of trust or mistrust about that incident. They were planted when my needs didn't get met by someone, when someone said something unkind to me, when I made determinations about my self-worth based upon how someone treated me. They were planted when I made determinations about someone else's worth based upon how that person made me feel. In short, I have been placing wedges in my life since I was born. We learn that if someone loves us, we feel loved and valued. If someone hurts us we don't trust and we feel less valued...I am sure you all have seen this poem:

A Child Learns What He Lives
By Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.

If children live with criticism,
they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility,
they learn to fight.
If children live with ridicule,
they learn to feel shy.
If children live with shame,
they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with tolerance,
they learn patience.
If children live with praise,
they learn appreciation.
If children live with fairness,
they learn justice.
If children live with security,
they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.
If children live with friendliness,
they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.
Well, the first 4 indicate that a child in that situation has the wedges of criticism, hostility, shame, ridicule planted in his life and the result or symptom...or self-defense of that wedge is condemning, fighting, shyness and guilt. Even the opposites of the last 5 will be wedges...if I child lives with intolerance, the child learns to be impatient and intolerant...and so forth. The child doesn't have these symptoms so much as a failure to forgive but as a natural defense or barrier to being hurt...things the child probably never even knew were forgiveness issues...they just were a part of that child's life.
We all have them...look at your life and see any area in which you are sensitive...especially hypersensitive...perhaps you have a neighbor who is bugging you, or an ex-husband who is being a jerk, or one of your kids are on your last nerve, or someone who you just can't stand to be around, or you are frustrated with the car ahead of you in traffic...etc...you get the drift. All of these are signs that there is a wedge in your life. They are all reactions to the defense that has been put up because of your life's experiences and the conclusions you have made with respect to those experiences.
So what is one to do about the perhaps hundreds of wedges in one's life. Wedges that were planted before we even knew they were being planted, wedges that have been so deeply engrained in our lives for so many years we don't even know they exist. I don't really know. Ideally we should forgive every little offense that has ever occurred. Not just what happens today...but every single past offense...even the ones we don't remember but have shaped who we have become.

I think the only way to do this is to wake up each morning with a clean slate for myself and a clean slate for every single person on the planet. If I have truly forgiven then EVERYONE has a clean slate...my mom, my ex-husband, my kids, my neighbors, etc. I can't not trust my neighbor because he did something yesterday...that would be a wedge. ... 70 X 7...be patient as ifshe has never irritated you before. I can't get mad at my son because he won't eat his food 70 X 7... OK...he's not eaten his food more than 490 times...can I just get a bit irritated about that? NO...that irritation is a sign of a wedge...no matter how many times...

Do you get my drift? We are who we are because of wedges or a lack of wedges. If you see someone who is especially negative or angry with the world, it is likely that many people or experiences have hurt that person and there are so many wedges in his life that he can hardly function. Those who are typically patient and pleasant have either mastered the art of forgiveness to the max, or they have not had many hurtful experiences to place the wedge in the first place...or they are now on mood altering medication.

I have come to realize that I have numerous...or should I say numberless little wedges in my life that are causing me great difficulty. They are what make me the person I am. They are what determine how I feel about my "neighbor"...that being all people. So I am going to make it my goal to remove as many wedges as possible, to wake up every morning with a clean slate for everybody I encounter that day. Do you think it is possible?...it sounds hard and will take time to become a habit...but that is what I think is the real meaning behind the "Parable of the Wedge".

Anyway...there's my blog. Perhaps it was not much to follow and you are not here with me to the end... If you did follow me...I would love to know your take on Wedges.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

I have finally picked a major!!!

It has been almost 20 years since I left my home in Scottsdale, Arizona to begin my new adventure as a BYU Co-ed. While in Provo, I had some fabulous times and met some of my very best friends. (In fact, I am at one of those best friends' house right now for summer vacation... She is the very reason I am actually blogging after so many months of silence. ) Unfortunately, while I was meeting new friends and having lots of fun, I never was able to pick a major... I mean at 18 years old I was supposed to know what I wanted to be when I grew up So needless to say, I continued having fun, meeting new friends, and not picking a major all the way out of BYU.

Well, it has taken me 20 years, but I have finally done it!!! I have chosen my major...(Paige insisted that I blog about it.) I am going to get a bachelor's degree in Family History. Yep...that's right...Family History. I am going to be a Genealogy Specialist and people will pay me to research their family history. The way I came to this decision was quite providential and I am excited to get started. BYU is the only college in America that offers a Bachelor Degree in Family History. It is a good thing I am up here in Utah so I can go to a guidance counselor at BYU to find out what will be required. So now I have chosen a major and I don't have to think about that any more...In the words of Forrest Gump..."That's one less thing!"....

Also in the words of Forrest Gump..."That's all I've got to say about that."

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Raingutter Regatta...it could go two ways!!!

Today was Jacob's Cub Scout Raingutter Regatta. Our ward decided that too many boys (or their fathers) have become proficient at Pinewood Derby Cars, therefore they opted to have a Raingutter Regatta race instead. So I, not having the first clue about building a Pinewood Derby car, much less a Boat, agreed to help Jacob build his Boat. Last year Jacob built a Truck for his Pinewood Derby car. When it weighed in as too light, I suggested that we glue BBs to the bed of the truck to look like it was carrying a load in back. Well, Jacob didn't win the race, and of course that was because of MY suggestion to put BBs in. He reminded me of that recently and truly believes if it hadn't been for the BBs he would have won. Never mind all the super cool, suped up, aerodynamic, slick and greased up cars that were entered...it was MY fault he lost because I suggested BBs. Go figure.

So when I took on the Raingutter Regatta I realized it could make or break me as a worthwhile mother. I got on the internet and did a little research to find the tricks to making a winning boat. I found that the catamaran does a much better job and Jacob and I went to designing the boat. I tried to let Jacob do most of it, but helped out a bit. We came up with a pretty decent design, however, neither of us are excellent at decorating such a thing...believe it or not, I can't paint decently to save my life...not even if it is just to paint it one color. So the boat was pretty plain...silver with a Blue Foil Sail.

As we were preparing to go, Jacob was certain he was going to win as he was convinced we had a secret weapon in building a catamaran instead of the typical boat. I warned him that about 1/2 of the boys would likely have done the same as they had access to the internet as well. It came to the moment of truth...the event that would make or break me as a mother for at least another year. The first race, Jacob lost...OUCH! I could see the tears being choked back....I just knew I was going to hear it soon...all my fault! The next race...JACOB WON!!! Yea!!! There is hope. Third and Fourth races...JACOB WON!!!. That put Jacob in the final race for his Den where he had to race the boy who beat him before...twice. If he didn't win both times, he would come in 2nd. First race...JACOB WON! Second race...Jacob Lost...but only by a little bit. Not wanting the excitement to go completely south, I cheered him and told him he came in 2nd place and how great that was. Jacob hugged me and said "Thanks Mom for helping me with my Boat!!!" YES!!!!!!!!!! I am a good Mom! And that's what it's all about!!!

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

A little political humor....


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Parody of Allan Sherman's "Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh" (itself a parody of Ponchielli's "Dance of the Hours")
Lyrics by M. Spaff Sumsion
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Featured on the Dr. Demento Show April 15, 2007
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Hello Hillary, Hey Giuliani
Here I am with President Romney
How he won this was a riot
Newsweek caught you two in bathrobes at the Hyatt
Mitt says our land needs reformin'
'Cause it's not completely Mormon
So protesters must speak softly
And the War on Drugs now targets tea and coffee
For his talks with dignitaries
Mitt just sends the missionaries
And state dinners - gee, they're mellow
All the heads of state bring casserole and Jell-o
Heads on Rushmore - you would dig 'em
Mitt just sculpted Brother Brigham
And the anthem needed switchin'
So it's now "I Hope They Call Me on a Mission"
Oh my word
He got elected
Oh my gosh
How unexpected
'Cause he's quite
Distinctly male and white
His V.P. Gladys Knight
Oh my heck
The far right trounces
Mormon lives
So Mitt renounces
Plural wives
But deep down they're OK
As long as none are gay
Now I don't know where we're headin'
But it might be Armageddon
So you sinners better move it
'Cause we're in the latter days and Mitt will prove it
I must meet the Elders' Quorum
At the White House here in Orem
So I'll run now - this is awesome
We'll be swearing in Chief Justice Donny Osmond!

Monday, April 9, 2007

Easter Traditions...

One tradition I started with my kids last year and continued with this year is making Peeps S'mores. I give the kids (among other things) peeps, hollow chocolate bunnies and graham crackers in their easter basket. Then in the evening just before we go to bed, we start a fire in the fireplace and roast peeps over the fire. If you do it right the sugar carmelizes nicely, they turn a beautiful golden brown. Then we use the hollow bunny and the grahams to make s'mores. The kids really look forward to this somewhat cruel practice...Here are some photos of the event...


Well, I made it through Lent. Actually, I was reading on the internet and it appears that there is some controversy among the Catholics about when the Lenten Fast actually ends. Some say on Palm Sunday...the Sunday before Easter. Holy Thursday....the Thursday before Easter. Good Friday, and Holy Saturday. Anyway...this year I decided it ended on Good Friday. This was more of a pending PMS/emotional decision. So for 3 days solid I ate mostly sugar beginning with a wonderful butterscotch rice crispy treat and going on to 3 Cadbury Creme Eggs...which I bought for Easter, Sugar coated almonds given to me for Valentine's day...all in just a few short hours on Friday. Saturday was ever more decadent...starting with the 4th Cadbury Creme Egg and a sleeve of Do-si-dos Girl Scout Cookies for breakfast, a 1/2 eaten bag of wonderfully stale marshmallows, another sleeve plus 4 of Girl Scout Cookies...Trefoils this time. I did eat a little spaghetti before continuing with my shameless binge. Of course Sunday I found myself surrounded with a cornucopia of sweet treats. By the end of the day, I was thoroughly disgusted not to mention nauseous....swearing I was going back to NO SUGAR on Monday. This morning I got up and ate a piece of left over stuffed French Toast with Buttermilk Syrup...OH MY GOODNESS! But that's it...I am going back to NO SUGAR...I mean it...really!!!

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Rites of Passage....

Right now Sarah is at her first, official, away from home (well just a block away) babysitting job. The people she is babysitting for have 5 children ranging in age from just a few months old to I think 9 or 10. That's quite a start, but she was so excited. It is surprising how nervous I am for her to babysit away from home. She is very mature and has a good head on her shoulders, but she's my baaaabyyyy.

So, while Sarah was enjoying her first babysitting job, Jacob mowed the lawn for the first time. I bought him a smallish lawnmower on Monday and told both Sarah and Jacob that they were going to learn to mow lawns and babysit. I told them of my friend Amy and her siblings who always had to earn the extra things they wanted including piano lessons and braces. I told them that they may not believe me, but working was good and made one feel confident. They moaned and groaned about the idea, but when I told them they could earn money mowing lawns and babysitting, they seemed to perk up.

Jacob can hardly wait to be proficient enough to mow other people's lawns for money. Today's job was a freebie. He's in training...training is free. Even when he's not in training...my yard gets done first and for free. He did a decent job and once the mower was warmed up, he was able to start it himself. It does take a pretty good pull to get it started...that'll toughen him up. Next we have to work on edging. He's actually excited to get to use the edger. We have a cordless edger which needs charging, otherwise he could have done that tonight as well. The battery inside sure makes them heavy though... Perhaps I'll have to get a lighter one.

I am so looking forward to the day when I won't have to pay a Lawn Boy anymore....

My babies are growing up....In some ways that's a good thing.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Giving up sugar for Lent & The Shangri La Diet

So I was sitting her surfing the net...because I obviously have nothing better to do...and I Googled "giving up sugar for Lent" and came up with a whole bunch of people blogging about that very subject. I found one that was particularly amusing... In her blog she talks about the Shangri La Diet and says she lost about 9 lbs in 4 1/2 weeks drinking sugar water... Now that's my kind of diet! I think I might try it...maybe I'll do the Olive Oil while I am doing Lent though.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Lehi Days and Get over it day!!!

I have been waiting for Lehi Days to come this year. It is this really cool thing where they have a rodeo and all kinds of fun kids activities like dress the goat and calf roping ...just a bunch of fun things to watch. I have been looking forward to taking my kids to it for months, but I didn't know when it was going to be...I should have checked. Well, it was last weekend...I had my kids with me, and I didn't know...so I missed it. When I heard about it I was soooo bummed. I mean REALLY bummed to the point of just ...well, you know really, really bummed... I guess there's nothing I can do about it but wait until next year and hope I know about it and my kids are interested in going, and it's my weekend to have them...arg!!!

OK so ....

Paige posted yesterday about National Get Over It Day. I have never heard of it and I didn't read her blog until today. MAN!!! I really have some stuff to get over, and if I had seen it yesterday, I would have really burned some stuff up. But NO....I didn't read it until today, and now it is too late and I am not going to be able to get over it until next year...WHATEVER!

Primary Lesson

OK, so tomorrow I am supposed to do sharing time in primary and I have no idea what I am going to do. I have known about this for a couple of weeks and have thought about it, but I still can't come up with any good ideas. What I do know is that the I will be giving a lesson at 3:00 tomorrow and I will talk about something. We will sing songs, teach a lesson and attempt to make it somewhat entertaining and/or interesting. By 4:30 tomorrow I will have done that and I will be relieved. I wish I could just go forward a bit in time, watch my lesson, and then pop back here and write it up so I don't spend the day today thinking about it. Typically I am NEVER able to prepare my lesson until about 1:30 before church and I miss sacrament because the ideas won't even come before that. That's just the way my brain works. But today I am determined to have the lesson prepared today...so I won't be stressed on Sunday. I was determined to do the same last month, but sure enough I missed Sacrament while preparing my lesson...It went very well. WHY CAN'T I THINK OF ANYTHING UNTIL THE LAST MINUTE

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Mid-Life Crisis...

I have decided I must be going through a mid-life crisis. I just turned 38...had a lovely birthday I might add...and am considering the fact that my life hasn't gone the way I had planned...duh..
My kids are 1/2 grown and although I had hoped to remarry and have at least two more children and not raise my family as a single parent, that dream doesn't seem to be materializing. I mean, how many years will I state boldly "This time next year I will be married and pregnant"? Obviously too many as nobody believes that statement any more than they believe that I am actually going to marry or have actually broken up with Kemp. Which, I might add, may have something to do with the fact that I am not married or pregnant year after year. But I digress...Mid-life crisis... In about 10 years I will no longer have children at home. If all goes as planned...and very few things in my life ever do, but I am holding out for this one...Jacob and Sarah will both be on missions. Now we all know how fast 10 years goes by...don't we? So, when I am 48 and both Sarah and Jacob are on Missions, what am I going to do? Hopefully I will not still be selling antiques on Ebay...OK, I've been doing that for almost 10 years now and I think I have grown enough from that experience. I am grateful I have been able to do it and stay home with my kids, but a professional garage-saler/ebay specialist was not what I wanted to be when I grew up... When I was 10, I stated boldly that I was going to be the 1st woman president... When I was 12, I wanted to be an attorney...yikes! When I was 16, I wanted to be an Arby's manager. (There's ambition for you!) When I was 18 I wanted to be an architect. When I was in college, I couldn't figure out what I wanted to be. When I was 22 I wanted to be a wife and mother. When I was 30, I no longer wanted to be a wife EVER! When I was 34, I changed my mind and thought it might be nice to be a wife to a nice person. Now I am 38 and I don't know what to be...I can't go on being a hippie forever...can I? Can I? Perhaps it is time to grow up...AAKKK! I never did want to do that. But I definitely don't want to be one of those old ladies who never grew up...I am afraid they are some of the people we see walking the streets with shopping carts filled with stuff. Actually, more than that...what the heck am I supposed to do with my life‽ (By the way, that is called an interrobang.) (Do you think I have ADD?) Anyway...that's my blog for today...

Wednesday, February 21, 2007


You know, I don't drink, I don't smoke, and I don't have se... never mind... You think that would be enough misery without giving up my favorite addiction...sugar. I can't think of any thing to live for any more. Not only does it coincide with my PMS as well as Paige's, but it coincides with Girl Scouts Cookies coming in and the grand opening of Neilsen's Frozen Custard. Fortunately for me my birthday is on Saturday and we always had an understanding that it was OK for me to eat sugar for my Birthday. I decided to do it big for lent and I was actually going to try to do it all in the Catholic tradition. I even wanted to go to Mass today and get ashes put on my forehead and walk around with a black cross on my head all day. I didn't get around to it, but I think I might go in on Holy Thursday and let the priest wash my feet...that might be cool. I wouldn't mind getting a palm cross on Good Friday or is that Palm Sunday. Anyway, some of the more orthodox Catholics even Fast on Wednesday & Saturdays during Lent. They also don't eat meat on Friday. It might try that. Just imagine how much weight I would lose if I fasted 2 days a week, ate no meat on Friday and no sugar for 46 days. I'll let you know how it goes. I can't imagine being any grumpier than I already am. Maybe I will wait on the fasting part until the sugar is out of my system. Sheesh!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

My new song...

OK...so Paige is always making up songs and goofy little poems...I came up with my own...

Here it goes...hmmmmm....

I have a Vanagon here on earth.
It is so good to me.
I want to share my life with it through all eternity.

Vanagons can be together forever.
I don't want to get hit by lightning for singing this song.

I always want to be with my own Vanagon,
and I don't want to get hit by lightning for singing this song.
I don't want to get hit by lightning for singing this song.

So what do you think? The kids and I sing this song while driving down the road in the Vanagon. We were singing the original version on Sunday in Primary, and I think I have ruined the song for at least Sarah.

Thursday, February 15, 2007




Monday, February 12, 2007

Running...and anxiety.

I used to run a lot. In fact I could run as many as 10 miles on occasion. I used to love to run. I started running because I had anxiety and running really helped with that. I would wake up in the morning with my heart pounding like crazy and I told my body if it was going to race like that, then it might just as well be running. So I started by walking around the block...a lot. Then I progressed to running and walking, then to mainly running. Eventually I could just go out and run for miles. It was so great. Believe it or not, for those of you who don't like to run, there is something that happens to your body once you get past the 1st mile. Your heart and lungs and brain all go into this Zen-like state and you feel really good. If you have never experienced it, you'll have to trust me on this one.

So anyway...somewhere between this year and last I stopped running. I don't know if it was the dating, the court case, the long hot summer, raising children, trying to make way more money than I usually need, the calling in the Primary Presidency or the care free hippie that doesn't have anxiety because she has a cool Vanagon, but I stopped running. Oh I would try to run here and there, but slowly and surely I got out of shape, and now running is painful, and my anxiety is coming back...so it is time to run again. However, I am out of shape and have to start slowly and come back.

So today, I ran a mile and it felt good...it's a start.

Friday, February 9, 2007

OK...this is weird...


My blogs

You know what I realized today? I can't possibly use this space for journaling. If you all read the things I would blog about...like the really meaty thoughts I have, or the things I do or experience daily, you would either be shocked, dismayed, depressed, appalled or very grateful for your own lives. But they would hardly be appropriate for sharing with the world. If I eliminate those things, you would likely be very bored. Today was one of those days that If I told you about it...you would go OH-MY-GOSH! And I might tell you about it in such a way that you would laugh hysterically and think..."Oh that Robin" or you would be shocked or probably both. I think I am going to try to see what life would be like without drama, but I don't know how. It seems that I go out looking for drama. I can't remember a time when I was without some major drama in my life. Sometimes it is fun to talk about and people are amused with the stories I have to tell, but maybe, just maybe, I would LIVE LONGER if perhaps I didn't have such a high drama/high stress life. So, how does one go about decreasing life long drama...any suggestions?

Thursday, February 8, 2007

Mormons...The Correct Answer...

Have you seen this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9yTs0wtemvU

Or How about this? http://www.ifilm.com/video/2419143

This one reminds me of my younger years...however, I was more like the first jumper...


And some days feel about like this... http://www.ifilm.com/video/2694402

I hope I made you smile with at least one of them. Have a great day!

Tuesday, February 6, 2007

Hey, I did it...I created a Blog Place for me....Yea!

Today I created a place to blog because I was jealous of Paige and Melinda and Michelle. Now I can tell you all the goofy things I think and do daily. Actually, I am hoping it will help me be a little better at journaling...good luck. So there it is...my first blog.