Sunday, February 25, 2007

Mid-Life Crisis...

I have decided I must be going through a mid-life crisis. I just turned 38...had a lovely birthday I might add...and am considering the fact that my life hasn't gone the way I had planned...duh..
My kids are 1/2 grown and although I had hoped to remarry and have at least two more children and not raise my family as a single parent, that dream doesn't seem to be materializing. I mean, how many years will I state boldly "This time next year I will be married and pregnant"? Obviously too many as nobody believes that statement any more than they believe that I am actually going to marry or have actually broken up with Kemp. Which, I might add, may have something to do with the fact that I am not married or pregnant year after year. But I digress...Mid-life crisis... In about 10 years I will no longer have children at home. If all goes as planned...and very few things in my life ever do, but I am holding out for this one...Jacob and Sarah will both be on missions. Now we all know how fast 10 years goes by...don't we? So, when I am 48 and both Sarah and Jacob are on Missions, what am I going to do? Hopefully I will not still be selling antiques on Ebay...OK, I've been doing that for almost 10 years now and I think I have grown enough from that experience. I am grateful I have been able to do it and stay home with my kids, but a professional garage-saler/ebay specialist was not what I wanted to be when I grew up... When I was 10, I stated boldly that I was going to be the 1st woman president... When I was 12, I wanted to be an attorney...yikes! When I was 16, I wanted to be an Arby's manager. (There's ambition for you!) When I was 18 I wanted to be an architect. When I was in college, I couldn't figure out what I wanted to be. When I was 22 I wanted to be a wife and mother. When I was 30, I no longer wanted to be a wife EVER! When I was 34, I changed my mind and thought it might be nice to be a wife to a nice person. Now I am 38 and I don't know what to be...I can't go on being a hippie forever...can I? Can I? Perhaps it is time to grow up...AAKKK! I never did want to do that. But I definitely don't want to be one of those old ladies who never grew up...I am afraid they are some of the people we see walking the streets with shopping carts filled with stuff. Actually, more than that...what the heck am I supposed to do with my life‽ (By the way, that is called an interrobang.) (Do you think I have ADD?) Anyway...that's my blog for today...


Wednesday, February 21, 2007

LENT

You know, I don't drink, I don't smoke, and I don't have se... never mind... You think that would be enough misery without giving up my favorite addiction...sugar. I can't think of any thing to live for any more. Not only does it coincide with my PMS as well as Paige's, but it coincides with Girl Scouts Cookies coming in and the grand opening of Neilsen's Frozen Custard. Fortunately for me my birthday is on Saturday and we always had an understanding that it was OK for me to eat sugar for my Birthday. I decided to do it big for lent and I was actually going to try to do it all in the Catholic tradition. I even wanted to go to Mass today and get ashes put on my forehead and walk around with a black cross on my head all day. I didn't get around to it, but I think I might go in on Holy Thursday and let the priest wash my feet...that might be cool. I wouldn't mind getting a palm cross on Good Friday or is that Palm Sunday. Anyway, some of the more orthodox Catholics even Fast on Wednesday & Saturdays during Lent. They also don't eat meat on Friday. It might try that. Just imagine how much weight I would lose if I fasted 2 days a week, ate no meat on Friday and no sugar for 46 days. I'll let you know how it goes. I can't imagine being any grumpier than I already am. Maybe I will wait on the fasting part until the sugar is out of my system. Sheesh!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

My new song...

OK...so Paige is always making up songs and goofy little poems...I came up with my own...

Here it goes...hmmmmm....

I have a Vanagon here on earth.
It is so good to me.
I want to share my life with it through all eternity.

Vanagons can be together forever.
I don't want to get hit by lightning for singing this song.

I always want to be with my own Vanagon,
and I don't want to get hit by lightning for singing this song.
I don't want to get hit by lightning for singing this song.

So what do you think? The kids and I sing this song while driving down the road in the Vanagon. We were singing the original version on Sunday in Primary, and I think I have ruined the song for at least Sarah.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

VANAGON!!!!!!






GUESS WHAT I BOUGHT TODAY.....

NOW I AM TRULY HAPPY! NOT THAT FLEETING KIND OF HAPPY, BUT TRUE, LASTING JOY!!!

Monday, February 12, 2007

Running...and anxiety.

I used to run a lot. In fact I could run as many as 10 miles on occasion. I used to love to run. I started running because I had anxiety and running really helped with that. I would wake up in the morning with my heart pounding like crazy and I told my body if it was going to race like that, then it might just as well be running. So I started by walking around the block...a lot. Then I progressed to running and walking, then to mainly running. Eventually I could just go out and run for miles. It was so great. Believe it or not, for those of you who don't like to run, there is something that happens to your body once you get past the 1st mile. Your heart and lungs and brain all go into this Zen-like state and you feel really good. If you have never experienced it, you'll have to trust me on this one.

So anyway...somewhere between this year and last I stopped running. I don't know if it was the dating, the court case, the long hot summer, raising children, trying to make way more money than I usually need, the calling in the Primary Presidency or the care free hippie that doesn't have anxiety because she has a cool Vanagon, but I stopped running. Oh I would try to run here and there, but slowly and surely I got out of shape, and now running is painful, and my anxiety is coming back...so it is time to run again. However, I am out of shape and have to start slowly and come back.

So today, I ran a mile and it felt good...it's a start.

Friday, February 9, 2007

My blogs

You know what I realized today? I can't possibly use this space for journaling. If you all read the things I would blog about...like the really meaty thoughts I have, or the things I do or experience daily, you would either be shocked, dismayed, depressed, appalled or very grateful for your own lives. But they would hardly be appropriate for sharing with the world. If I eliminate those things, you would likely be very bored. Today was one of those days that If I told you about it...you would go OH-MY-GOSH! And I might tell you about it in such a way that you would laugh hysterically and think..."Oh that Robin" or you would be shocked or probably both. I think I am going to try to see what life would be like without drama, but I don't know how. It seems that I go out looking for drama. I can't remember a time when I was without some major drama in my life. Sometimes it is fun to talk about and people are amused with the stories I have to tell, but maybe, just maybe, I would LIVE LONGER if perhaps I didn't have such a high drama/high stress life. So, how does one go about decreasing life long drama...any suggestions?

Thursday, February 8, 2007

Mormons...The Correct Answer...

Have you seen this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9yTs0wtemvU

Or How about this? http://www.ifilm.com/video/2419143

This one reminds me of my younger years...however, I was more like the first jumper...

http://www.ifilm.com/video/2664043


And some days feel about like this... http://www.ifilm.com/video/2694402



I hope I made you smile with at least one of them. Have a great day!

Tuesday, February 6, 2007

Hey, I did it...I created a Blog Place for me....Yea!

Today I created a place to blog because I was jealous of Paige and Melinda and Michelle. Now I can tell you all the goofy things I think and do daily. Actually, I am hoping it will help me be a little better at journaling...good luck. So there it is...my first blog.